As I was dragging myself from the car to the house after a long day at work, I happened to catch a glimpse of these.
Signs of life.
I was drawn to them.
I had to get close. I had to feel their warmth.
It was the same feeling I get when I’m close to a baby; only instead of baby fever, it’s spring fever.
Breathe it in, instant peace.
Breathe it in, instant energy.
Breathe it in, instant life.
OK, you got me. MIA is not technically a word per-say. I should have said, “MIA: One Abbreviation, Two Meanings.”
First Meaning – I have been MIA for a few weeks now to the Internet world. I’ve not been totally MIA, but the sitings have been rare. If I were famous, the paparazzi would be getting big bucks for capturing my rare sitings in Internet land. Anyhow, so I’ve not been writing as frequently as I prefer to. I wish it was because I was off doing amazingly fascinating things, but nothing too terribly fascinating has been going on. Instead, I’ve been consumed with pushing through winter. I usually get home in the evenings, and when everything else is done, I write. However, during the past month or so, after I’ve forged through my day at work and attempted to contribute to the household, I’m dead exhausted. I sit down to write, but end up zoning out in front of a blank screen or dozing off. I have plenty that I want to talk to you about, but the energy hasn’t been making it through my finger tips. I’m hoping that when this Arctic weather backs off, my drive and energy will return, and I can pick up the writing pace.
Second Meaning – Steve is spending the week in MIA, AKA Miami. While Moanna and I are up here in the worst winter Virginia has experience in over ten years, Steve is living it up in Miami with the sunshine, warm weather, the ocean and palm trees. He is there on business all week, but I’m still a little bitter about it. I hope he as a successful work week, but part of me wants it to be cold and dreary all week. Hey, don’t you judge me. I am fully aware that I have a few issues to work through when it comes sunshine sharing. Steve was fully aware of this crazy side of me when he married me. We’re in negotiations as to how often the sun can shine when his is MIA.
To bring things full circle. Because Steve is in MIA, I am MIA to the Internet world. He pulls a lot of weight around the house, and when he’s not here, I have to cover for him. I don’t mind picking up the slack while he’s out of town because I know he’s working hard for our family, but man, it royally bites some days.
**In case you were wondering, I am aware of the crappy flow and grammar in this post. I’m just too tired to go back and fix it. If I take the time to fix it, you may be waiting another week for the next post to come. I’m zoning out and dozing off, so just roll with it. I’ll try to be more alert next post.
When I am under an immense amount of stress, be it physical, mental or emotional my Fibromyalgia symptoms intensify. When the weather is brutal cold my Fibromyalgia symptoms intensify. Sometimes for no apparent reason my Fibromalgia symptoms intensify.
In the past few weeks, I have felt pain and exhaustion that I have not felt in several years. I wake up, and feel like I never slept. No, I feel worse in the morning than I did when I went to bed. The pain throughout my entire body is so deep that I can’t find comfort anywhere. My mood is down. My patience is shot. My outlook on life is not what it should be. I am not a fun person to be around, and I don’t even like being around myself when this happens. If I could get up and walk away from myself, I would.
When Fibromyalgia takes control, it takes everything I have to make it through the day. I can only do the bare minimum. It takes everything in my being to get up in the morning and go to work. You can forget being any help or support to my family when I get home from work. They are lucky to get frozen pizza for dinner on a bad day. Laundry, cleaning, writing and playing are not an option. Relaxing isn’t even on the table because that is how much it hurts and how exhausted I am.
Don’t get me wrong, there are times when I can fight it and push the pain and exhaustion away, but it’s been a long time since I’ve been able to fight back. When, Fibromyalgia takes control, I’d rather be somewhere else – somewhere far away from where I am now, far away from me.
I’ve come across this video on a few blogs that I read, and wanted to share it with you.
It’s garunteed to make you feel warm and fuzzy inside. You might even be inspired to sing along.
Didn’t that feel like a big fat hug?
It’s time to return to the realities of the world. Christmas is over. The New Year has come and gone. The party is over. It’s time to return to work, but I’m just not ready. Really, all I want is one more day – one tiny little day. Please? Pllllllleeeeeeaaaaasseeeeeee. Please. Please. Please. Pa-pa-pa-pa-pllllleeeeaaasseeee.
I’m sorry for all the whining. Spending two weeks with a sassy two-year-old has gotten the best of me. But seriously, I do need one more day to do all of the things I was supposed to do, but didn’t.
I need one more day to get my laundry in order.
I need one more day to figure out all of these medical bills I have.
I need one more day to clean up my family business plan for this year (I’ll share more of that with you later).
I need one more day to take that nap that I’ve been aching for.
I need one more day to organize and backup all of our pictures.
I need one more day to make something delicious in the kitchen.
I need one more day to wash my bras.
I need one more day to organize a few projects for this blog.
I need one more day to dust, vacuum and polish and sanitize.
I need one more day to play with Moanna.
I need one more day to do nothing. NOTHING.
I need one more day to pretend that reality doesn’t exist.
Don’t you need one more day too? Come on. Yes you do. Don’t lie to me. I know that you could use an extra day. I can see it in your eyes.
I’ll talk to my people, and you talk to your people, and maybe we can work something out to extend all Holidays to extend one day longer than we would expect. I think that we can pool our forces and make this thing happen. We can go to Congress and ask for one more day. We can call it, “The One More Day Act.”
While we’re there, we also need to ask for “Good Weather Days.” Don’t you wish that school/work would get called off when we have a freak-of-nature good day in the middle winter? Wouldn’t it be great to wake up and turn on the TV, well I guess we get these kinds of messages on our phones now, and read, “School is cancelled due to sunshine and warm temperatures. Please take this day to enjoy the outdoors.” ? I think that the “Good Weather Day” is the answer to seasonal depression.
Now that I’ve taken us on quite the tangent, let’s refocus.
I’m sure you’re wondering what I did do with all of my time off. Since I just rambled off a long list of stuff that I didn’t get done, I’d say that’s a fair questions. Well, I’ll tell ya. I spent time with family, playing in the kitchen, playing with Moanna and Steve, tidying up the house, retidying up the house and resting.
I really enjoyed this time away from work for the Holidays. It was great. However, I just need one more day. If I had one more day, I could knock at least half of those projects off of my list. I would be a new woman. Well, maybe not totally new, but at least I could lower my handicap on the course a little. And, no, that was not a Tiger punch. I was talking about the course of life silly.
Come on. Fess up. What kind of things do you need just one more day for? If you could make the world stop spinning for 24 hours so you could catch up with the rest of the pack, how would you spend that time?
