Me, Myself and Mommy

Every where you look there is something in the news about the health care system. I don’t want to get all political here because golly forbid some whisper a word about “change” and the entire country is in an uproar. If you want to go there, the comment section is all yours to go left, right, red, blue, donkey, elephant.

All I’m going to say is that health care is way too expensive, and it thoroughly plucks my nerves that you are required by law to have car insurance (or pay a huge wavier fee), but for many people it’s impossible or criminally expensive to get health coverage . If someone can begin to make sense out of this, I would love to hear from you because I just don’t get it! It also makes my skin crawl that if you make little or no money, your pregnancy is covered by the government, however, if you are working to support your family but do not qualify for insurance or you’ve not had insurance long enough to cover a pregnancy you’re up a creek without a paddle or canoe. You are screwed.

Slowly step down and walk away from your soapbox Renee. This is not supposed to be about politics. This is supposed to be about medical bills and finances.

Last fall, I went through some serious medical stuff complete with emergency surgery. We’re talking expensive stuff. Thankfully, we are blessed with insurance that pays for 80%. That aside, we still owe a crap ton (remember, we learned that tern the other week) of money. I’d say the whole shindig (labs, doctor visits, ambulance transport, surgery, hospital stay) is going to set us back upwards of 2k. For some of you that may seem like nothing for good medical care, but when you are on a tight budget 2k stings.

Here is the other kicker. The medical field is quick to send your tail to collections. They have no patience.

Get this, the first bill I received from the hospital was a letter saying that my account was 90 days past due, and that I had 21 days to pay off the balance in full before they sent the bill to collections. HA-HA-HA! First, the letter was dated February 1, and I didn’t receive the thing until February 16. Second, I don’t know what I’m paying for because I’ve not seen the itemized bill. Third, how can this be 90 days past due when this is the first bill you’ve bothered to send me. Forth, I don’t have the $1,500 plus you want in full. I can’t give you money I don’t have.

After I stewed, no fumed, for a day or two, I called the hospital in a calm tone, firm, but calm. The poor woman on the phone had no idea what she was in for when she answered my call. I was nice to her, but I did force her to spend a good half an hour on the phone with me. I told her that I was not at all happy that the first bill I received was a final notice. There was also no way on Earth that I could pay for this thing in full, and I was absolutely not paying a dime until I had an itemized bill in front of me to confirm that the charges were accurate.

The lady was understanding. She read me the entire bill line-by-line and is mailing me a hard copy. We talked about payment options, and she removed the 21 day ultimatum giving me a month to make the first payment after I receive the hard copy.

Now that I have bought myself some time, I am planning my next move (it feels like I’m playing chess with these people). When the itemized bill comes, I’m going to review it line-by-line. Anything is appears to be inaccurate will be fought. Once I am confident the charges are accurate, it’s time to negotiate.

Did you know you could do that? Your insurance company negotiates with the hospital before they pay up. You can do the same. A hospital would much rather cut you a deal and get a large chunk of money up front than to wait each month on the tiny payments you’re going to make over the next two years. It costs the hospital a lot of time and money to deal with your pesky payments.

Now this is just one example of the many medical bills I’ve been playing hardball with over the past few months. A few went to collections before I had time to blink. I’m telling you they are sneaky little buggers. We’re seeing to it that nothing touches my credit. It takes a lot of time and organization to keep it all straight, but it’s necessary.

There is one bill in particular that I really don’t want to pay. I have never been treated with such disrespect by doctors and nurses before in my life. They do not deserve a single cent for the lack of care I was given. I’m not going to get into that whole saga here, but I’m going to have myself a chit-chat with this particular facility before I hand over a check.

I’m not telling you to not pay your medical bills. I don’t need your hate mail telling me that I hate hospitals or that I am trying to cheat the medical folks out of money they deserve. That is not what I’m doing. During a very scary time in my life, I received excellent care by excellent doctors in excellent facilities (with one exception), and I am happy to pay them what they deserve. What I am telling you is that it is important to be vigilant when it comes to medical expenses. It is important to review your bills carefully. Hospitals make mistakes all the time, and if you do not catch and correct them, you will pay for them. You have the right to negotiate your medical bills, after all, that is what your insurance company did. You also have the right to be given proper medical attention in a respectful and manner. Don’t let people walk on you, especially when you’re feeling crappy to begin with.

Alright Politician, the floor is yours. Speak your peace.

My friend, this took me longer  than I’d care to admit to organize and figure out (ahem more than four hours). I have been tracking our money all month long, so I knew where we stood. However, just because I was tracking the money doesn’t mean it was organized. Tonight, I spent forever, FOR-EV-ER, sorting out all of the expenses into categories (gas, groceries, living expenses, etc.). I’m telling you, I was a teenager when  I started categorizing all of our expenses, and now I’m 42.

While it took forever, FOR-EV-ER, to do this, it was a vital step in taking control of our spending. Now that we know how much we spend on entertainment, food and things like this, we can work to cut back and then put more money towards paying down debt. I did a gosh darn good job on the grocery bill this month, if I do say so myself.

Drum roll please….

Together Steve and I made $4,788.25. This is the money that we put in the bank and earned in cash. This is after health insurance, dental, vision, retirement, some taxes and some life insurance came out of our checks.

Our expenses for the month totaled $4,340.25.

Which at first though, made me think, “Wow we have an extra $448.00 on hand.” Then I remembered, that we haven’t turned in our tithing for the month which is almost exactly $448.00.

Here is the breakdown of our expenses for the month…

A few things to point out about the expenses…

CC stands for credit card. R-SL1 stands for Renee Student Loan 1.

Living expenses include rent, utilities, cell phone and renters insurance.

We got hit with a few late charges. We paid $22.67 in late fees on the car taxes, and $39.00 in late fees on CC Green. The frustrating thing is that these late fees were not incurred because we didn’t have the money on hand, but because we were not organized in our paper work. This is $61.67 wasted! WASTED! GONE! BUH-BYE! That money could have gone to a few dozen different things.

Through diligent couponing and grocery add scanning I saved $73.11 on my groceries and drugstore purchases (household and hygiene products). We did really well on our food expenses this month, but I’ve also depleted our food storage. Next month, I anticipate this expense going up to restock the pantry.

Owning two cars is really expensive! The car payment, the maintenance, the gas, the insurance, the taxes. We spent more money on transportation this month than we did on living expenses. There is something seriously wrong with this picture.

Minus $20.00 for my annual OBGYN visit, all of the other medical expenses we paid this month were left over from last year. My medical bills were huge last year, and the $300+ that we paid this year, is just a small junk of what we owe. OUCH.

We lost Steve’s birth certificate more than a year ago, so we had to spend $20.00 to replace it. Another expense that was incurred because of our lack of organization. I bet we find the last one eventually, which will also drive me insane.

Despite the expenses that were incurred because of our stupidity, I think we did good this month. I’m proud of the financial learning that took place. We know where our money is going, and how we can work to cut costs. We paid more than our minimum payments on our credit cards, and my student loan. We also spent an entire month experimenting with ways to track and organizing our earnings and spending.

At this rate, we should be millionaires by the end of the year. Har-har… Ok, so we won’t be close to millionaires but we’ll be worth a lot more than we are now.

This is a learn as we go situation, so keep treading water with me, as I figure this out. I’m still trying to find the best way to share our earnings and spending with you. I don’t want to bombard you with a post for every single purchase and bank deposit we make. I also don’t want to save it all up for one mac-daddy (did I just say mac-daddy?) post at the end of the month like I have been so far. You’re going to take one look at it and go, “That is way too much information in one post.” CLICK. You would close the window and never return. I’m making this up as I go along. As you’re tagging along, I could really use your advice. After all, one of the main points of Me, Myself and Money is to learn from each other.

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In the mean time, we had an interesting evening here the other day with a piggy bank and an old purse. I had a revelation, or a rerevelation because I have a feeling this thought has crossed my mind before.

Steve’s best friend, Andy, gave Moanna a piggy bank for Christmas. It was a big pink pig with her name on it. Andy told Moanna that it was for, “Saving money to make her dreams come true.” Moanna didn’t care about the dreams; she was excited to have a new place to put all the change she finds around the house. If she finds money laying around, it’s hers.

We decided that Moanna should move all of her money from her old piggy bank to the new one. It would be a fun project for her. It would also be a great opportunity for us to teach her about money. Before Moanna was born, even before we were “dating,” Steve and I had many conversations about how important it is to teach children about money. The new pig was our segway into teaching Moanna about compound interest, credit cards, supply and demand, negotiating, residual income… Slow down? Too much information for a two-year-old? You’re right. We’ll start her financial education by letting her play with money and getting familiar with it.

We dumped all of her money out on the table, and let her have at it. For a short while, she was fully engrossed in her little project. I even had her separating the money into piles. Her enthusiasm quickly waned when I tried to turn her fun into a learning project. She got impatient with me when I tried to explain that the big one was a quarter and the pink one was a penny.

Steve took over. They took turns dropping change into the pig, and giggling. I think Steve had more fun than Mo. When they got near the end of the pile o’ change, Steve told Moanna that I had more change for her. Her interest perked up at the prospect of more money.

“I do!?”

“Yes, in  your old purse.”

“Really? I had no idea.”

I fetched my purse and began digging. After pulling out several dollars in change, and a few dozen pens, I realized Steve’s alternative motive was for me to clean out this purse and get it off of our bedroom floor. Sneaky. I continued to pull out handfuls of change, pens, markers, hair ties, receipts, medicine, gum… You name it. It was in there.

As I looked at this pile of stuff that I had pulled out of my purse, I was suddenly horrified by how much money it represented. Correction, how much wasted money it represented. Not only did I hand Moanna $10.00 plus in change, but I had pulled out hundreds of dollars in receipts. Receipts that were mostly for things that I had eaten rushing to-and-from work, or things that I no longer owned like a calendar or makeup (I don’t even wear makeup 95% of the time). I came across several expired coupons – really good coupons – coupons for things that I buy on a regular basis.

I stopped counting pens and markers when I got to twenty. Do you have any idea how many pens I have purchased because I couldn’t find something to write with? I found a bottle of pain killers, and a bottle of expired vitamins. I also found four stray prescription painkillers. Those could have really come in handy this winter. I discovered several hair ties and hair clips, a pack of mints, a pack of gum and a brand new tube of chap stick.

How much money does all of that stuff add up to? $50.00? Easily right? Add that to the $10.00 in change and the tons of receipts. That equals a crap ton (official financial terminology).

Unreal.

Maddening.

I went to bed wondering, if I found that much wasted money in one medium sized purse, how much more money had I let go to waste because of my disorganization, poor planning and stupid purchases? If I cleaned out my car or the desk, what would I find? How about the boxes and boxes of stuff that were never unpacked after we moved for the eighth time in two years?

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Here are some things to think about this weekend…

How much change is in your purse? Car? Nightstand? Couch?

What do you do with your change? Give it to your kids? Save it? Donate it? Buy yourself something pretty? Pay down debt? Buy dessert?

How much money do you waste because of disorganization, poor planning and stupid purchases?

I have a feeling these kinds of questions are going to come up again and again as we learn about money. I just hope my answers become less embarrassing over time.

I’ve been tracking our income and spending for the first two weeks of January, and buddy, it’s unreal. It’s amazing how quickly the dollars leave the bank account and how slowly they come in. You’ll see what I mean in a few days when I share that with you. Until then, I want to give you an idea of where we are starting and where we are trying to go.

Wait, before we get started, we’ve got a few disclaimers or what- have-you to go over.

First. I will share with you every dollar we make. However, I am not going to separate mine and Steve’s income. We both bring home the bacon, and we both know how to burn it. If we sell something on EBay or have a yard sale I will identify that income and detail those experiences.

Second. Our cost of living type expenses are going to be lumped into one number. This will include rent, utilities and cell phones. I have my reasons.

So, here we go…

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As of January 1, 2010 we had a total of $2,039.34 in all of our many bank accounts. It looks good on paper, but I promise you that money is already spent. I am impressed that we started the year with that much. There have been years that we’ve had less than $200.00 as our starting point.

Below, I have added a chart of all of our debts. It hurts. It keeps me awake at night.  It’s why we don’t own a home, travel the way we dream or buy fancy things. It’s one of the reasons I still work. This is one of our biggest financial challenges.

DEBTS

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With that being said, here are our financial goals and plans for the year of 2010.

1. We are going to track every penny we make and spend in order to learn where our money goes and to gain more control over our spending.

2. We plan to pay off all of our debts except the car and student loans by the end of the year. We know this is ambitious, and that we will run into holes in the road, but this is our plan.

3. We are going to dispute the errors that were found on our credit reports.

4. Everything we eat must be purchased from the grocery store except for one date a month. There will be times when this is not possible because Steve travels for work sometimes and must eat to stay alive.
* One of our other family goals is to eat more organic foods. We have budgeted for slightly higher grocery bills to cover this expense.

5. We will be having a massive yard sale in the spring, selling things on EBay, and doing other things to make extra money.

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Having that big honking chunk of debt staring at me is a little scary. It’s maddening to know that if we didn’t have debt, I could be a stay at home mom if I that was my desire. $1,233.33 a month goes to things of the past. At least half of it goes to college days that are long gone. The other major junk of it goes to a car that is worth less than half of what we paid for it.

The other side to this is that it’s empowering to stare back at that $1,233.33. Putting it all on paper and adding it up let’s us know what were working with. Now that we have a real number, we know what we’re up against and what it’s going to take to win the race.

When was the last time you had an honest conversation about money? Can you remember? OK, if you can’t remember the last time you openly and honestly spoke about money with your partner, your parents, your children, your friends, then when was the last time you were honest with yourself about money? When was the last time you said, “Self, this is what your bank statement looks like, and this is where your money goes.” You can’t remember that either? Do you remember, but you don’t want to admit what your Self said to you about your money? Or, do you not want to admit that you address yourself as “Self?”

In school we all go through sex education. At a very awkward age, our parents give us “the talk.” We stay up late talking and giggling with our friends about it. There is information everywhere you look in college to protect you from making bad sexual choices. Don’t get me wrong, I think it is very important to educate our youth (and to continue that education throughout adulthood) about making healthy and positive sexual decisions. HOWEVER, HOW-EVER, why don’t we put this kind of effort into education our population about money? Why don’t we go through personal finance education in grade school? Why don’t our parents give us “the money talk”? Why are we afraid to talk to our friends about money? Why are there not posters and fliers blanketing college campuses about making healthy money decisions? Instead, there are tables setup outside of the dining halls tempting students to sign up for credit cards. If you ask me, that is the financial equivalent of handing out free condoms with giant holes poked in the ends.

It’s time to put an end to this whole talking about money is taboo business. It’s time to start honestly talking about money. It’s time to educate ourselves, each other and our children (please, please our children) about money. It’s time to introduce Me, Myself and Money.

Me, Myself and Money is a new section of Me, Myself and Mommy.  I am going to chronicle every penny that Steve and I earn and spend. I’ll talk about our financial goals. I will talk about the thought process that goes behind our financial decisions. I will talk about our financial successes and our financial setbacks. I will talk about our good choices and the dumb ones. I will talk about how earning and spending money makes me feel. I will ask for your advice.

My hope is that by openly and truthfully talking to you about my finances and financial thought process, you will begin to openly talk about your money with your partner, children, parents and friends. Since we’re being open and honest here, I also hope that by sharing the intimate details of my finances, I will gain full control over my money instead of my money having control over me.

How are you holding up over there? Breathing OK?

I think this is going to be hot. I think talking about money can be just as sexy as talking about birthcontrol options.

I saw you blushing. Don’t hide it.