Gratitude 08.13.2010

Today I am grateful for productive mornings. I haven’t been particularly productive this morning, but somehow even though I wanted to sleep until tomorrow morning I managed to peel my stiff self out of bed and start my day. I have managed to make Mo breakfast, unpack two boxes, start laundry, sort through some papers, straighten up and now I am sitting here watching a movie with Mo and talking to you.

Now, I haven’t cleaned the house top-to-bottom or finished unpacking every single box, so you morning folks are dancing circles around me. Morning folks, you amaze me, how do you do it?

When I am able to get up early(ish) and accomplish things in the morning, my entire day is filled with productivity. It’s perpetual. I am thankful when I have productive mornings because it’s really hard to be grumpy and have a  bad when it’s not even 9:00AM and you can cross several things off of your day’s to-do list. Productive mornings make me feel like I am in control of making great things happen in my life and for that I am truly grateful.

Gratitude 07.21.2010

Today I am grateful for surprises. It is not often that I am surprised; not much gets past me. I am a sharp cookie, so when someone manages to surprise me, I am both grateful and impressed.

Today started off as what appeared a normal day for me. Little did I know that my entire day was nothing but smoke and mirrors. I was buzzing around work trying to wrap up as much as possible before my last day, having no idea that everyone around me was sneaking around right in front of my face planning a surprise going away party. I suspected nothing.

When I walked into what I thought was a client meeting, I was shocked to see my entire staff, a few close clients and my daughter waiting on me. What on earth? How did they pull this off? How did all of this food make it out of the kitchen without me noticing it? How did they know to use purple? I was totally surprised! I suspected nothing. It wasn’t until after the shock and tears wore off that I started to piece together everything that was going on right in front of my face. It was like the surprise ending at the end of the movie, and after the movie you go, “ohhhh that makes sense now.”

I am very thankful for the time and energy that everyone put into pulling off such a wonderful surprise to make me feel special during my last week of work. Had I known it was coming, I would have been an emotional wreck all day. I am deeply grateful that I did not arrive at my going away party with a puffy face, and I am even more grateful that someone was finally able to truly surprise me, especially with how many people were involved.

Gratitude 06.20.2010

Today I am grateful for the energy and positivity of young children. This video says it all…

P.S. This post is in honor of Steve (who I am also grateful for today) on Father’s Day. He ran across this video online one day, and fell in love with it. When he gave Moanna her baby blessing, one of the things he emphasized was how important her positive energy would be. He told her that her positive energy would influence others and bring sunshine into their lives.

Happy Father’s Day!

Gratitude 05.31.2010

Today I am grateful for three day weekends. Most weeks I am lucky to get two days off a week; it’s a real treat when those two days off are in a row. When three day weekends roll around, I am ecstatic.

I personally believe that three day weekends should be mandatory. Two days, let alone one day, is not enough time to rest and relax, get chores and errands done and have fun. Some people manage to pull off all three in a day or two, but I do not have that kind of stamina. I need one day to rest, one day to do chores and errands and one day to have fun. When the rare three day pops up, I am giddy because that is how much time I need to have a “real” weekend.

Because I had to work on Saturday, my Memorial Day Weekend began on Sunday and will continue through tomorrow. And, even though I have been quite sick I have been able to rest, relax and have a little fun. Tomorrow I hope to accomplish a few things on my chore and errand list to make it a complete weekend.

Three day weekends allow me to visit family and friends. They give me a fighting chance at catching up on my responsibilities outside of work. Most of all, they give me the opportunity to recenter myself and refocus and that is why I am deeply grateful for three day weekends.

Gratitude 04.25.2010

Today I am grateful for my church calling as the Relief Society Secretary of my ward. I was called as the secretary back in the beginning of December, and it has taken me until just now to be truly grateful for the job. If it were not for my calling, I can promise you I would not be attending church every Sunday.

Just a few weeks after receiving my calling, I had barely gotten my feet wet, Steve began traveling for work. After Moanna and I went to church without Steve for the first time, I wasn’t sure if I could do it again. In addition to the normal Sunday routine of getting dressed, getting to church semi-on-time, bribing Moanna to be good, taking her potty, taking her to nursery, picking her up from nursery, I also had a list of RS responsibilties that I had to take care of. I had to be at church early to make copies of handouts and talks, while Moanna was tearing up the church library. I had to make sure the roster was handed out and updated. I had to collect information at the end of church while Moanna ran down the halls.

At first, I was really frustrated with the situation. I had just been given a huge responsibility on top of everything else I have to accomplish in a week, and My husband, who by the way agreed to help and support me in this calling, was traveling for work everyweekend, leaving me to handle it all on my own. I already work 60+ hours a week, why did my one day off turn into another day of work?

I spent week after week on the verge of tears setting in the church peu because I felt like I was failing at everything. I couldn’t keep my child in line during church, I wasn’t doing my calling justice, and I was so exhausted that it was hard for me to feel the Spirit. After several months of the circus act that had become my Sunday, I finally realized why God called me to be the RS secretary. If my calling didn’t require me to attend church every Sunday (a once a month teaching calling wouldn’t have been enough), I probably wouldn’t have gone to church.

The Lord knew that it would be really hard on me for Steve to be out of town, especially on Sundays. On Sundays, it would be so much easier for me to stay home and rest, catch up on house work, forgo the fight to get Mo in a dress, to get dressed myself. If I didn’t “have” to go to church, if people were not depending on me to be there every Sunday, I would be skipping church on a regular basis. I am extremely grateful for my church calling, and thankful that it has kept Moanna and I in the routine of going to church while Steve is on the road.

Gratitude 04.05.2010

Today I am grateful for the light at the end of the tunnel. When you’re up to your neck in work and stress, knowing that there is an end in site can keep you forging ahead and fairly sane.

Today starts the beginning of a very busy week and month at work. It’s paralyzingly just thinking about how hectic April can be. To keep myself from being suffocated and consumed by everything that I need to accomplish in the month, week, day or even hour, I keep my focus on the light at the end of the tunnel.

“When April is over, I will have the summer months to look forward to.”

“There are only two more days left in this week then I will have Sunday to go to church and relax.”

“As soon as dinner is served I can go home and watch my favorite TV show.”

“I only have one more hour worth of information to get into the computer; when it’s all in, it will be time to eat lunch.”

I prefer not to wish my life away, but sometimes looking forward to the end (and giving myself small rewards like a second dessert) gives me the motivation to keep going and to do a good job.

I am grateful that there is always a light insight. Knowing that the tunnel can be only so long gives me permission to breathe and relax. I am thankful that April too shall pass, and at the end of that long tunnel, lies May.

Gratitiude 01.19.10

Today I am grateful for silence. I love the between moments when there is no noise and no movement. The house is empty, the TV is off, there are no appliances running – everything is peaceful and quiet. Sometimes in these moments, I can even turn off my thoughts.

These moments don’t come often in this crazy life. For me, they happen when everyone leaves the house and I’m suddenly alone,when I’m sitting in the car for a minute before getting out to go inside, or just after lunch when I return to the office before anyone discovers that I’ve returned. It’s nice to just be still and melt into the warmth of the silence. Sometimes it only takes a minute or two of solidarity to rejuvenate and refocus yourself.

I am thankful for  the brief moments of silence that come and go throughout the day allowing us to take a deep breath and let the tension. I am also grateful that I am learning to recognize these opportunities for silence and take advantage of them.

Gratitude 12.30.09

Today I am grateful the New Year. I know that it’s not quite here yet, but knowing that 2010 is swiftly approaching brings me a sense of renewal and rejuvenation. New Year’s is one of my favorite holidays. I’m not so much about the midnight excitement, but the fresh start the next morning  brings. I love that New Year’s is shiny and new. It sparkles with the many possibilities that will unfold over the next twelve months.

This New Years isn’t just the start of a new year. It’s the start of a new decade – a new era. What events will define the next 10 years of our lives? Will it be a national tragedy? Will we end our dependence on oil? Will poodle skirts and sweater sets come back into style? Will we find the cures to the world’s most deadly diseases? Will we elect our first female president? Will the marijuana become legalized?

No one knows. That’s the beauty of it. I am so grateful for the many possibilities that will come my way in the next year, (or 10 years). I can dream about what events will shape my life and how I will grow. But, I am most grateful that despite my best planning efforts, I have no idea what will come. The unknown is the best part.

Gratitude 12.14.09

Today, I’m grateful for good days. Really good days.

I’m not talking about a day where something exciting happens. I’m not talking about a day of shopping and eating out. I’m not talking about a day of doing nothing. I’m not talking about a day when something memorable happens. In fact, you probably won’t even remember this kind of good day a month from now.

I’m talking about a good day. It’s a day when you wake up and you feel good. You feel refreshed. You accomplish things. Your body feels strong and healthy. You feel productive. You’re calm. You enjoy the tasks and chores for the day. You feel in control, confident and content. It’s a good day.

Days like these are more profound for people that suffer from fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, arthritis, depression, lyme disease or any other long term ailment. For some, good days are rare. When you’re going through a long spell of pain and exhaustion, it is hard to remember what it’s like to feel good.

Last Monday was a good day for me. My fibromyalgia symptoms were almost noneixistant. I woke up before my alarm went off, and felt rested. That almost never happens. I had a productive and enjoyable day at work. I went grocery shopping. I cooked dinner. I cleaned the house a bit. I felt no pain. I felt no exhaustion. It was a good day.

During the winter, especially with this cold and wet weather we’ve been having, good days do not come often for me. I can go weeks, and sometimes more than a month without a good day. When a good day does come along, I am so grateful. Good days bring me hope. They remind me that I have dreams and goals that are bigger than just making it through the day without my body crumbling beneath me. When I have a good day,  I feel that I am adding value to the world around me. Good days push me to get through the bad days. Good days cultivate more good days, and that is something that I am deeply thankful for.

Gratitude – 11.25.09

Today, I am grateful for Thanksgiving and the way it brings us all together. Recently, I’ve grown to appreciate the holiday in ways that I didn’t in years past. With how fast the world is spinning these days, I have a feeling many others feel the same way.

We’re all so busy trying to make it in life, that we don’t take the time to get together and enjoy the company of others. Our lives are consumed by work, bills, taxes, insurance, house work, car maintenance, meetings and so on. All of this leaves little time for much of anything else. Thanksgiving gives us the opportunity to enjoy family, friends, food and fun. We come together to eat, laugh, argue, cry, play, sleep and enjoy life.

On this Thanksgiving, I am thankful for Thanksgiving and the way it reminds us to enjoy the company of others.