A Note to the Young Ladies – Wear More Fabric
When you work in the food and beverage industry, you have the privilege of watching people celebrate life. It is one of the reasons that I love the business of food. Many of these celebrations are milestones in one’s life like birthdays, weddings, graduations, awards, anniversaries, promotions – you know, the type of celebration where pictures are taken so the special day can be remembered years and generations to come.
This weekend I had the opportunity to make a cameo appearance where I used to work and help out with a special event. In a lot of ways it was very similar to many other events that are held each year. Family, friends and special someones have gathered together to celebrate a special occasion in their sons’ (or daughters’) life. Moms are glowing with love, dads are beaming with pride and the young ladies are wearing next to nothing. Gym bath towels cover more than many of the dresses I saw last night. These dresses were backless with plunging necklines and so short that they barely covered their rear ends.
Why ladies? Why do you give away everything you have before the date even starts? And why do you put it all out there for your boyfriend’s grandfather to see? Do you want to be remembered as “that girl friend who dressed like a prostitute”? What if you end up marrying this boy? Those pictures of your husband’s graduation where you are dressed like you are out to catch are going to haunt you for the rest of your life. Do you really want to fuel your in-laws’ fire that way? Are you trying to kill your father by wearing clothes that until now he has only seen in the movies?
Now, I am not much older than you, so please don’t take this as your mother denying you your right to flaunt what you have while you have it. I have dressed in saucy little numbers a time or two to parties and clubs. Despite my best efforts to purge the internet of incriminating photos, I am sure that if you dig deep enough you will find me dressed and behaving in ways that would make my family deny me. However, no matter how far you dig you will not find me dressed scandalously on special occasions.
When you get dressed, especially for a special occasions where family and pictures are involved, think about the message you are trying to send. I doubt you want the elders to get the message that you are hot in bed. No, you want to give the impression that you are attractive and confident. And if you are attending your boyfriend’s graduation, you want his parents to look at you and think “She is so great for him. If they end up getting married, she’ll fit in just fine with our family.” I promise that dress that is all strings and so short and tight that you are afraid that if you take a deep breath it’s going to pop right off is not saying “attractive and confident.” That dress is saying, “I’m sleazy and uncomfortable,” because let’s be honest no one is comfortable when they can’t breathe.
You want to give the attractive and confident message? Wear more fabric. It is possible to look sexy and classy all at the same time. If you want to show some skin, only show off one body part at a time. If you want to wear a strapless dress, then make sure the dress comes down at least to your knees. If your dress is shorter than the knee, then your chest should be hidden. If you want to show some cleavage then cover your shoulders. You get the idea. If the occasion is too conservative for skin (ie your grandparents’ 50th anniversary), then wear sassy little shoes. You would be surprised at how far a pair of shoes can take you. If shoes don’t do it for you, then spice up your outfit with jewelry; think dangling earrings and an elaborate necklace.
I know you have class and character. You are intelligent, charitable, savvy, creative, loving. You are also attractive, confident, sexy. You are rich with everything you have to offer to the world. Please don’t cheapen yourself by dressing like you are on the way to the Red Light District. Don’t give it all away the second someone lays eyes on you. Make someone get to know you before they form opinions and judgments about who you are. If you must wear something scandalous, then save it for the club where your elders can’t find you. Even then, we could all use a little more mystery in our lives, and that dress that is all strings and so short and tight that you are afraid that if you take a deep breath it’s going to pop right off leaves very little to the imagination. I’m not asking you to give up your right flaunt what you have while you have it. I’m just asking you to think about the message your clothes are sending. When you look back at your life and all of the pictures that have been taken along the way, you are going to see that you have made some poor decisions along the way. Out of all the things in life to feel pains of regret over, clothes shouldn’t be one of them. So please, wear more fabric so that when you find the pictures of your husband’s graduation you think, “What a great day that was,” not, “I look like a hussy! It’s no wonder my mother-in-law has never liked me.”
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So true. I’m no prude but somewhere along the way, “less is more” became grossly misinterpreted by legions of the under 25 set.
If only someone had sent a similar warning to me in the 80s, not so much about my clothes, but a memo about the heights of my hair…hindsight is 20/20.
Haha! Oh the hair of the 80s. I bet your hair was wicked rad.
I agree 100%. some of the prom pics of high school girls bother me. Why do parents of these young girls allow them out. If you can’t sit down because your dress is too short…it was the wrong dress!!
Moanna has this much (holds hand out to just past shoulder width) creative freedom. Once she steps out of that range, then I it’s time for an intervention. And dresses that you can’t sit in come no where close to acceptable.
You are right about a”peek being more alluring than letting it all hang out. There’s nothing at all sexy about a woman who has to pose like a manequin because slight body movements would cause a wardrobe malfunction. Men like to use their imagination when it comes to wondering what’s under a woman’s frock. Walking around nearly naked takes that fun away from them!
If I can’t comfortably eat in an outfit than it’s not worth it to me.
Ugh, it’s so hard to deal with seeing what “prom dresses” look like these days — and my 10 year reunion is still several months away! What has happened in the past decade that suddenly it’s a-okay to look like a tramp in front of relatives even? I must sound like a prude to girl like that, but I don’t care. I’d rather have class any day.
I remember wearing formal dresses to prom. Today it’s all micro cocktail dresses!